I have finally come to terms with the fact that I am something of a perfectionist. I have no idea what side of the family this comes from, it doesn't seem to be present in any member. It comes out in a big way during a party. Usually if I am fixing some meal and I want it to be extra perfect and wonderful. I can worry myself into a panic over minute details that nobody else will care about, but God help you if the turkey isn't at ninety degree angle on the platter! OK, that's an extreme example, the turkey can sit a little off sided, but if it's not the right shade of toasty doneness...
One might assume that having a touch of perfectionism can also be an indication of a little bit of OCD. In this case, I'd say you're a little right. I'm pretty sure I have a very mild touch of OCD, but then again I think science has said we all have a little of it. I can be notoriously picky with bedsheets, to the point that it's almost ridiculous. I toss and turn at night, so I like some sheets that will grip the sides of my bed quite tenaciously. I'll spend up to twenties minutes making my bed in order to make sure the fitted sheet lays the way I want it to, and is tucked in firm to prevent all the material from forming around me during my sleep.
Even while I walk around the bed double checking everything, I know it's completely crazy. It's so obvious I'm teetering on the brink, that even my cat looks at me with an expression that reads “I'm not so sure about you anymore, but will it affect my kibble?” Parties is when my perfectionism comes out the strongest. Take my annual Christmas bash, last year the perfectionism starts with the cleaning. Like a crazed person, I scour every nook and cranny of my abode, even the ones I know no one will be going in during the festivities.
Then comes the food for the party, and that is when I become super anxiously critical of everything. Last Christmas, before I gave you my heart, I thought that a good idea for the party would be a plate of cupcakes decorated in a tight group to give the look of the Humble Bumble from the beloved Rankin-Bass “Rudolph” TV Christmas special. As I baked the cupcakes and began to frost them according to the directions that I have made on super fancy graph paper.
About half way during the frosting process, I noticed that my little brilliant idea for an adorable mass of Humble Bumble cupcakes was going quite wrong. It looked like a mass of just blue and white and flecks of black decorator's gel. I began to panic, “Christmas is ruined!” I thought to myself. I ran around the house thinking desperately what to do in order to fix the situation, and I may have blacked out for 15 minutes, but I don't like to talk about that.
When I woke and found myself in my bathtub, it hit me. The perfect plan to save the Humble Bumble mass was to change it into something different using the same themes of color. In a fit of panic and fear of a party being ruined by cupcakes, I took my spatula and smooshed all the frosting together, making a big blue/white swirl look. I informed my guests that the cupcakes where a tribute to when Sonic the Hedgehog would go into spinball mode in his video games. This was not considered odd by any of my guests, as I keep a Sega Genesis hooked up to the TV in my living room, because I am sexy like that.
In the end the fret and worry that I put into these things are not worth the energy, my perfectionism isn't likely to go away anytime soon, but it does appear to be more manageable than it once was. For now though, I must go, I have to make a Reptar costume for an upcoming party and I've gone through eight different ones already, lots of green fabric astray in my house.